Leading Change
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Does Your Ministry Have a Bentley from the Bachelorette?

Charismatic, good-looking, selfish, and pretentious people plague ministries by their unaligned influence and multiplying others who seek to derail the mission, vision and values.

Bentley from the Bachelorette deceived Ashley and nearly caused my wife (and me) to attack the screen on several occasions. His interactions reminded me of many people I have come across in ministry who have charming personalities but impure motives for being involved.

A few ways to discern whether you have a Bentley on your hands:

  • Asks for a leadership position right away before demonstrating any commitment.
  • Builds a following of others (usually young/immature) that promote a different agenda.
  • Has a strong but unaligned take on a theological or soteriological issue.
  • Passive agressive behavior.

As a leader I was most tempted to empower a Bentley when the present reality of my ministry was not meeting me expectations or struggling in a critical area. These types of people certainly bring a temporary lift but within a few months their influence is more negative than positive.

This short video interview with Ashley reveals how easy it is to be deceived, and to let yourself become deceived:


  1. I wouldn’t know anything about the story you’re referencing (the Bachelorette is Lisa’s department) but those are some great questions to ask and excellent reminders when building a team! Great post Brian!!

  2. Brian, Too funny that you saw the first bachelor in person. A couple years ago, my wife and I were having dinner one Saturday night at a Mexican restaurant in podunk Newnan, GA, and just two tables away was a veteran of two Bachelor/Bachelorette seasons–Deanna. I hear she’s now engaged or married to the brother of a contestant from an altogether different Bachelorette season from hers.

    • no way! we were big fans of deanna over here.

      i’ve noticed this season they are intentionally trying to bring the public in at various points–they must have figured out that it helps create loyal followers of the show!

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